How family dynamics can profoundly impact someone's emotional maturity and ability to function as an adult, writes edwardsmft
. Invisible rules contribute to stability and cohesiveness as families encounter and respond to evolving challenges and changing conditions of life. Power struggles often encircle invisible rules, and even rare experiences of open acknowledgment may act as checks-and-balances necessary to ensure overall flexibility in the family system. Flexibilities in the range of allowances within families decrease unnecessary power struggle and tend to decrease a range of chronic emotional anxieties as well.
One member may become relationally distant and another may become depressed, resulting in the distant member's return to a deeper level of emotional engagement. One member may fail to fulfill a role, and another may become angry. One member may cut-off from the family to regain self-composure or may engage in a negotiation of compromises that provides for a more agreeable shift in family role functioning.
The behavior of family members flows out of the emotional climate of the family system, not unlike the operations of a thermostat, which kicks on regulatory cooling when temperatures run high and regulatory heating when temperatures run low. In a similar but far more complex fashion, families have many different types of thermostatic feelers. Emotional feedback loops in families shape much of their behavior. Family therapists are trained to intervene at the level of the family emotional system.
A family's degree of cohesion is related to its degree of adaptability, and its degree of adaptability is related to its styles of relatedness. When one family member experiences emotional disconnection from their family, their own feelings establish the terms of their reality. The facts of the matter are nearly superfluous.
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