As a nonbinary dad, my fatherhood is bound up with my effort to make the world a safe and affirming place for all kids.
Ever since I was a little girl, I dreamed of being a father one day.
As a nonbinary adult and a parent of a 4-year-old, I have a more realistic view of fatherhood. I am aware of the misogyny that made motherhood look bad to me, and why fatherhood seemed so appealing as a child. However, I haven’t let go of the dad fantasy entirely. Nowadays, I am attracted to being a nonbinary dad for some of the same reasons that I am drawn to being a rabbi. I enjoy creatively expanding on traditional roles.
These Jewish images for fathering powerfully resonate with me. Both a dad who sprouts breasts to feed his child and a compassionate father-God with a womb, imagine a dad as someone who offers the unconditional love and protection that I longed for as a child. On top of this, the vivid imagery and gender playfulness of these stories makes use of the type of creativity and humor that I inherited from my own dad, and still see as central to the role of nurturing a young mind.
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