Ask Amy: Do I have to accept my wife’s secrecy about her past?

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Ask Amy: Do I have to accept my wife’s secrecy about her past?
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I want to know about her lover and she refuses to tell.

My wife of 57 years had a lover in her youth.Should I accept that stance on her part or should she comply with my request?You don’t say why you are so curious about this very long-ago love affair – at this stage in your own life.

People tell me to just be myself, but this “myself” wants to hug her for a long time. At this point in time, she doesn’t allow hugging or touching.My whole being hurts so much when I think of the suffering my daughter, son-in-law and her 14-year-old sister are going through!Dear Grandma: Keep in mind that returning from an in-patient program marks a stage in recovery, but is not the end of recovery. Your granddaughter’s recovery is a process that could take a very long time.

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