She seems to have a crush on my husband, and she implies I’m lazy and a bad wife.
If she is good with your son, then that positive dynamic should be your primary concern. It is important that you keep this in mind as you course correct and adjust to one another.
You should examine if you have taken this entirely the wrong way, triggered by your other annoyances. However, if this sort of comment would cause your son to feel bad, or be anxious, then you should correct Darla about matters having to do with tone. Your husband should make clear that his workday has already begun when she arrives in the morning: “So, after I’ve let you in, I’ve got to get right to my work. It’s best if I’m not interrupted, unless it’s important.”
It is unclear if they know how intoxicated they are, yet they often admit how they “overdo” their medication before they visit – otherwise their pain will prevent them from getting out of the house to see family.
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