Ask Amy: My partner didn’t care for me during chemotherapy

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Ask Amy: My partner didn’t care for me during chemotherapy
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Dear Amy: I had hoped that he would cancel his plans so he could be at our home to help me out, but he went ahead and make airline reservations, after he knew the dates of his vacation would coincide with my treatment.

Dear Amy: My partner owns a vacation home in the Southwest. Months ago, he made plans to take three of his teenage grandchildren their over spring break.Advertisement

I am feeling hurt, rejected and unimportant to him, in addition to feeling the ill effects of my treatment.I could have used his help with meals, driving to the clinic, and overall companionship.Amy, he rarely sees these grandchildren, who live within 15 minutes of us. On the face of it, your partner doesn’t seem to have placed a high priority on being your stalwart helpmate. For many people, showing up during an emergency illness is a high calling. Doing so can elevate you to realize your own better nature.One of the joys of being a good grandparent is to spend “quality time” with your grandchildren, indulging them with special experiences.

Factors that you don’t mention could be related to how and why you two chose each other in the first place – such as whether he went through a divorce that has made him feel insecure and guilty toward his children and grandchildren.I hope you’ve chosen to talk to him about this, honestly expressing how this episode has made you feel.

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