My daughter and I both know I'm not the same as other moms. But there are still good days with chronic pain and illness, and this is how we cope.
I open my eyes to find my five-year-old daughter standing beside my bed, peering at my face for any signs of distress.so that one of us can sleep in a little. It’s my shift this morning.I slowly turn toward her, careful to hide my grimace as my joints protest. I’m in the middle of a flare-up, but I make an effort to smile and reassure her.She stares back at me, a hint of frustration in her big blue eyes. She can tell that something is off by the way I respond.
But we both know I’m not the same as other moms. Every day is different when you’re a parent with chronic pain.. We’re meant to be the heart of the family—the one who nurtures, performs domestic duties and keeps everything running smoothly. But I lost my cape a long time ago. I no longer have any special powers in my daughter’s eyes.
I’m beyond lucky to be married to a husband who does more than his fair share of parenting and chores, but it takes a heavy toll on him, too. Looking after me and my daughter leads to “compassion fatigue,” where a caretaker feels burned out and depleted. It also weighs heavily on our relationship. But I’ve discovered that chronic illness doesn’t define me or make me a bad mother. I’ve learned to be more cautious with my promises now, but I still make every effort to be present and available for my daughter. I also set realistic expectations for myself and, if I’m in the middle of a flare-up or a bad pain day, I ask my husband or family for help.
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