He does not want me to stop visiting, nor do I want to.
What can I do to make everyone relax, so he and I can still remain good friends without someone disapproving?I wish I understood exactly what the family’s objection is to your friendship with this person. Are they afraid you are after his money? Or are they incapable of understanding that homosexuals can have platonic friendships with straight folks?
If you and that gentleman want to remain friends, you may have to grow a thicker skin. You cannot please everyone, and whether his family “approves” is beside the point. I hope you will keep doing what you have been doing because it is beneficial for that man to have a friend he can count on.My sister, who is quite a bit older than me, was married to a man for more than 20 years. He was a part of my family from the time I was 3.
As an adult, I want nothing to do with him. However, my sister and mother insist on him being involved in our important gatherings. I feel they completely disregard my feelings, and I have since removed myself from those gatherings. I feel cheated, but they say it’s “necessary” for him to be around their shared children, and they keep trying to make me feel like I am being unreasonable. Am I?You are not unreasonable; you are pragmatic.
Enforcing boundaries is not unreasonable. While your sister and mother may prefer hiding their heads in the sand “for the sake of the children,” who by now should be pretty close to adulthood, you have every right to keep your distance. From my perspective, what you are doing is healthy.is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips.
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