Dear Abby advises a man whose ex-girlfriend cheated on him and a woman in a painful family situation.
My longtime girlfriend and I broke up recently. One of the reasons was because we didn’t agree on a definition of cheating. She met a friend through work whom I met once, and what I saw and heard during that interaction screamed he was a sleaze who wanted to move in on my girl. I voiced my concerns and asked her to stop seeing this friend, and she agreed.
A week later, she renewed the friendship, communicating through Snapchat. For six months she would have drinks with him, go places with him and have conversations with him without telling me. She swears they never did anything physical. I had seen the signs — from time to time I’d notice she wasn’t where she said she would be, the car would smell like smoke, and we were growing apart. One day, I finally had had enough and we agreed to separate. Since our first day apart, they have been together.
My two older daughters are now planning a celebration of life for him. The problem is that they live out of state and they want to stay with me. I do not want to be involved in any of this “celebration” or even host them. Their relationship with their father during their growing-up years was turbulent because he was an angry person most of the time. Now he’s their hero, which I also find painful because I was always their “protector.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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