Dear Abby advises a woman stuck in a bad marriage and hears from a “perpetual planner.”
My husband lies to me all the time. It could be about spending money or something as small as forgetting to start the dishwasher. He nearly went too far with a woman from work. I finally spoke up after I felt it was an emotional affair. His response? “Well, you and I weren’t getting along, so I didn’t see anything wrong with it.”
I’m not sure why I stay because he doesn’t act like he wants me to be around. He’s obsessed with video games and doesn’t act like he respects me. What should I do? Why do I feel I deserve to be treated like this? —You are asking excellent questions. Although your husband has no interest in getting to the root of his behavior by talking with a licensed psychotherapist, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t consult one.
My family and friends say I need to ease up and be more flexible when plans change. I try to be, but often another person’s lack of planning greatly impacts my day — e.g., carpool changes that force me to take conference calls while rushing to and from. Or friends showing up 35 minutes late for a dinner reservation.
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