She has a grief counselor, and I’m wondering if he’s really helping her move forward.
My friend seems stuck in the role of grieving widow. I don’t mean to be insensitive to losing a life partner, but I worry about her mental state. Please advise what I can say or do to help her.I am relatively new to the grieving experience, having lost my husband 3-1/2 years ago, but allow me to share some insight. The adage that there is no timetable for grieving is accurate. Some widows and widowers are able to move on quickly.
If your friend needs to idealize her “up and down” 45-year marriage, please don’t rain on her parade. Let her enjoy the fantasy, if it is one. And, when you know she’s going to be depressed and crying on those milestone anniversaries, ask her out to lunch or dinner so she won’t be as isolated as she feels. If necessary, tell her that after such a great loss, it’s no wonder she’s feeling awful, AND SHE SHOULD MENTION IT TO HER THERAPIST.
Ours was a whopper, and the reason they wanted to eat there became quite obvious. I was annoyed because I felt our friends should have applied their gift card to the entire bill, and we would then split it. My wife says we had a nice evening and I shouldn’t feel miffed, but I still think we were treated poorly. What are your thoughts about this?It would have been gracious for your friends to have applied the gift card universally. However, the two of you are good friends with this couple.
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