Dear Abby: Woman feels relief when her ailing boyfriend said he wants to end their relationship

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Dear Abby: Woman feels relief when her ailing boyfriend said he wants to end their relationship
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My problem is the relief I feel. There are no meltdowns, no angry outbursts, no having to tiptoe around our conversations. ... I didn’t realize the pressure I was under.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of four years has been diagnosed with chronic traumatic encephalopathy, or CTE. We’re both only 51. Obviously, we face a grim reality. He has already tried once to end our relationship to spare me the inevitable, but I convinced him I’m in it to the bitter end.

My problem is the relief I feel. There are no meltdowns, no angry outbursts, no having to tiptoe around our conversations. Until now, I didn’t realize the pressure I was under. My dilemma now is: If he wishes to continue our relationship, should I? His anger is scaring me, and he’s losing himself so quickly. He’s not the man I grew to love.

DEAR TORN: The relationship you shared with your boyfriend is essentially over. You stated that his illness is turning him into someone else. You are not his wife, and you are not responsible for his well-being. Talk with his family and suggest they create a long-term plan for his care. He is going to need one. Because the emotion you are feeling now is primarily one of relief, allow this man to end the relationship if that is what he wants to do.

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