Dear Annie: You get a lot of letters about people whose partners fell in love with someone else, causing a rift in their partnership. I find a lot of these couples lacked communication, so I thought I’d share my story of what can happen when you just talk.
Annie Lane writes the Dear Annie advice column.You get a lot of letters about people whose partners fell in love with someone else, causing a rift in their partnership. I find a lot of these partners lacked communication, so I thought I’d share my story of what can happen when you just talk.
He admitted he did, and we had a long discussion about what that meant. I never raised my voice. In fact, I was sympathetic, listening as he explained his worries, his guilt, his hatred of himself for falling for another woman. And I just listened. He needed a sympathetic ear, not an angry, jealous wife. I was still open about the fact that it hurt, but we talked about it calmly, like adults.
It’s made a massive difference while he works through this, and in the long run, it’s actually made us closer. He talks to me about it when necessary, no judgment, and I can tell it takes a weight off his shoulders to do so, because of those guilty feelings. While we’ve never used counseling, we’ve both said we’re open to the idea if it becomes necessary.
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