HolaPapi: 'How does a person deal with knowing that an online presence would likely increase their chances of success in their field but they don’t want to be known online?' jpbrammer responds
I regret not thinking of you sooner, but I think you’re the man for this question.
I also feel like a hypocrite. I consume and engage with public/semi-public content , but I don’t add to it. Can you call that a “lurker mentality”? How do you participate in the world?This feels like the sister letter to the one about being too offline. Seems like everyone doubts their internet habits. But it makes sense! On the whole, social media is still a relatively new phenomenon.
We are more likely to pick up on crucial subtleties of communication — tone, facial expression, physical gestures, and so on. These can help calibrate messages closer to their intended meaning. It doesn’t just go one way either. My time on the internet has blurred the distinction between my online identity with my offline personhood — my sense of self. I’ve placed a lot of value in metrics — in numbers that are meant to determine how funny I am, how insightful, how attractive, how talented. I would not genuinely invest in these things if I had not, on some level, agreed that I am my social-media profile.
It sounds like a nightmare, doesn’t it? Yet many of us log on anew every day. As you mentioned, it can be great for your career, but I don’t think that’s really what keeps people hooked. Most of the chronic social-media users I know are in a lot of pain, and they are candid about it. “Oh, Twitter is miserable,” they’ll confess, or they’ll talk about how much anxiety it gives them or how they wish they could use it less — before firing off tweets from the bathroom.
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