Are you ValentinesDay ready? 💕 DrEmilyJamea shares her latest tips on SexualDesire.
., is a sex therapist, author and podcast host. You can find her here each month to share her latest thoughts about sex."It wasn't always like this. We couldn't keep our hands off each other in the honeymoon phase."Desire is the most common, yet complex, issue that brings couples to sex therapy. I estimate that 90% of the phone calls I receive are from couples struggling with a difference in sexual desire.
They told a story I’d heard many times before. Things had been great in the beginning. They experienced a whirlwind romance after meeting at a cocktail party in London, where they were both attending a conference. They dated long-distance for the first year, and, like most couples who date long-distance, indulged in long weekends full of passionate sex whenever they got the chance. When it became clear they were falling in love, Jacqueline put in a request at her global company to relocate.
“That’s for damn sure,” said Jacqueline. “She starts pouting, which is a huge turnoff. Sometimes I give in just so she’ll be happy again, but I don’t think either of us feels good about that. It’s really deteriorated our relationship. I think we both feel like we’re walking on eggshells around each other. That alone kills my interest.”
“It usually happens after spending a relaxing weekend together. Jaq’s job stresses her out, and I know she needs time to decompress. So we’ll take it easy, and usually I just ask her. I’ll say, Hey, what do you think about having sex today? And if she says yes, we do it.”“It’s still really good,” says Jacqueline."It’s not like I don’t enjoy sex. I’m just never in the mood. It’s not as wild as before, but we both experience pleasure and satisfaction.
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