What really makes someone's life go well? It usually comes down to this, writes John_T_Maier
or well-being, then we want to know what well-being, fundamentally, is. Similarly, if one goal of therapy is for the client to become better off or happier as a result of the therapeutic process, then therapists, too, should have some interest in the question of what makes our lives go well.Pleasure
. What makes a life go well is simply pleasure. Conversely, what makes a life go poorly is pain. The quality of a life consists of the sum of its pleasure minus the sum of its pain.. What makes a life go well is the satisfaction of one's desires. Conversely, what makes a life go poorly is the frustration of those desires. One may desire pleasure, but one may desire other things as well . The quality of life consists of the degree to which one's desires are satisfied..
There is extensive debate about which of these views is correct but this list is usually taken to be, if not exhaustive, then at least representing the most compelling answers to the question of well-being. If we are thinking of things from the point of view of therapy, however—either as providers or as clients—this list can feel curiously incomplete. In general, our aim in therapy is not to increase pleasure, nor to obtain items on some preset objective list. It is something of an axiom in most approaches to therapy that the aims of therapy are set, in some sense, by the client herself. But these need not, and typically will not, correspond to the satisfaction of her desires.
While it is somewhat distinct from standard philosophical theories, it is also intuitive. When many of us reflect on our lives, we reflect on relationships and projects that we have sustained over time and, going forward, intend to continue to sustain. These relationships and projects do indeed satisfy our desires, but arguably that is not what makes them so central to our well-being.
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