How a writer learned to open up about Dad's secret sex books

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How a writer learned to open up about Dad's secret sex books
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Sara Faith Alterman's 'Let's Never Talk About This Again' is a memoir about strange family dynamics, love, grief and the benefits of finally opening up.

Readers thought Stephanie Danler’s debut novel, “Sweetbitter,” was autobiography. The reality, in her memoir “Stray,” is far more painfully dramatic.My first draft was terrible because it was full of dumb jokes and puns and I was tap dancing around sincerity. My editor called and said, “You need to cut all the [crap], you need to just tell the story. You’re dancing around the truth here and the whole point of this book is that you were raised to dance around things that were uncomfortable.

I still talk to the readers but not to the degree that it takes you out of the moment, with a parenthetical, “Wink wink, did you get that joke?” My editor played a huge role in helping me curate my puns. I still lean very heavily on wordplay or “dad jokes.” I was raised to think that stuff was fun. It just automatically happens in my brain.Things got left out for discretion. I wanted to respect people’s privacy and comfort levels.

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