Nathan and Michael have rearranged their lives to keep their son alive amid lack of social supports, insufficient mental health care, policing issues and financial strain. – via healthing_ca autism mentalhealth healthcaresystem
Nathan: Unfortunately, we’ve become isolated and distanced from most of our old family and friends because they don’t understand our son and his needs, so we’ve had to create our own chosen community that supports us.Nathan: The challenge with his mental health is that it’s so cyclical. He may be in a pattern where he is up all night and sleeps during the day and that may correspond with him being suicidal at night or impulsive.
Michael: Sometimes, neither of us have the bandwidth to deal with whatever is happening, and we’ve called on other people for help. One thing we’re good at is that if Nathan is having a bad mental health day, but my day is worse and I just can’t do it, he can compartmentalize long enough to get our son through a challenge until I can step in.Michael: You will fight, you will argue, and you will disagree, but understand that you’re not fighting against each other.
Nathan: I have completed my PhD, but that kind of career is gone because of my own mental stress and his needs. I wouldn’t have the ability to keep up with the demands of a full-time job because I’m already in trauma mode, so I work part-time and that gives me the flexibility our family needs. In addition to lost income, our son is a compulsive spender, so we also have to be able to cushion that so he can live.
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