Want to get others to like you? While confidence can help, showing that you’re genuinely interested in the other person counts the most. Here's why.
by chanting affirmations in front of a mirror, based on the idea that people are attracted to those who act self-assured and dominant. Norman Vincent Peale’smay be the best-known self-help book that advocates for this approach, but books offering advice on pick-up techniques or climbing the corporate ladder promote an agency approach as well.
While it’s true that we form an impression of a new acquaintance within minutes of interacting with them, the researchers rightly point out that first impressions take shape even before a single word has been spoken. That’s because we develop an initial sense of whether we like someone based solely on their looks. We then modify that initial impression based on the first few minutes of our initial interaction with them.
When it comes to popularity, though, a dash of agency in the form of confidence, boasting, and dominance can actually increase how much people like you. But this is only true if you add this on top of a base of communal behavior. That is to say, confidence can be sexy, but only if you first show how much you care about others.
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