His betrayals had ripped my guts out, yet I believed him when he said he wanted help.
I have always had a pretty high sex drive. I’m game several times a week. Thankfully my late first husband and I had a matching libido, leaving both of us happy with our sex life. As a young 52-year-old woman when he died, I hoped I would meet someone equally compatible. It was one of my non-negotiables once I started dating.
There could have been a couple of explanations. It would have made sense if my husband was tired. Maybe he would have preferred if we postponed our special night until we’d rested. Or, perhaps, he wanted to include pornography as part of our sexual life, but he never brought it up. For a long time, I felt like a human version of a paper-doll. I dressed, walked, and talked, yet was barely alive. Emotionally numb, I survived in a frozen state of shock. I stayed, hoping things would get better.My ex-husband is a self-proclaimed sex addict. For a while, he half-heartedly attempted recovery. The betrayals never stopped; he just got better at hiding them. Our marriage lasted two years before it ended in divorce.
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