Is it time to stop swiping? Lakshmi Rengarajan's new podcast reframes the old-school setup as a more intentional analogue to dating apps.
And you think a setup is shoving people in the bar, but there’s all these different ways. There’s a woman who met someone on a plane and then a year later was like,How are you finding these people—the candidates and the couples?
Tell me more about the “story profile” that you have the candidates fill out and share. When I was listening to the setup episodes, I was struck by how intentional those questions for the “bio” appeared. Well, dating is a pool, right? There are only so many single people at one time. So there’s not just exhaustion that comes with swiping. It’s arriving at a date when the other person has been on eight shitty dates, and you’ve been on nine shitty dates, so together you have 17 shitty dates.
The more I think about it, the more I’m realizing how unnatural the apps feel by comparison. Like, the other night, I was watching one of those pop-psychology TikToks that was like, “Dating apps introduce you to people you don’t normally meet. But what if that’s because you’re notto meet them?” A hilarious high thought. But I did close the app down and had a long, hard think about it.
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