Children who are continually told that they’re lazy (or worse) may become so discouraged that they fail to pursue — or even to notice — the things that they’re good at and enjoy doing. Like everyone
. Suddenly, he could focus. The doctor encouraged him to assess his interests and strengths — and move forward from there. “I had always loved to cook, but never thought I could actually make a living at it,” he recalls. With the help of therapy, he recognized that he has a knack for creating recipes. So he returned to the community college and studied food service.
Some experts say that this “finding-out” process should begin even before a child starts to show preferences or special abilities. “The first step is to actually believe that your child has strengths, that success is possible, despite — or because of — ADHD,” says Catherine Corman, of Brookline, Massachusetts, co-author of, and the mother of teenage triplets with ADHD. She says it’s vital for parents to pay attention to the things that interest their children.
Robert Tudisco is another adult with ADHD whose strengths took awhile to come to light. Growing up, he knew he was smart, but no one seemed to notice. “There was more going on behind my eyes than I was given credit for,” he says. His difficulty handling the paperwork related to his cases made little difference because the environment at the D.A.’s office was often chaotic. A few years later, however, when he opened his own practice in White Plains, New York, this weakness became painfully apparent. “Suddenly, I was the one who had to run the office, keep track of time, and be organized,” he says. “It was a nightmare.”
“I’m cognizant of the fact that my students have different ways of learning,” he says. “So I teach using a variety of methods — visually, aurally, with practice written tests, and so on.” Without this empathy, he says, he wouldn’t be nearly as effective.
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