WASHINGTON—In an effort to offer the American people full transparency, Defense Department officials confirmed Monday that the unidentified flying objects shot down by the military were just regular planes, and the nation had just been really high. “Yeah, so it turns out everyone was just toking it up over the weekend…
WASHINGTON—In an effort to offer the American people full transparency, Defense Department officials confirmed Monday that the unidentified flying objects shot down by the military were just regular planes, and the nation had just been really high. “Yeah, so it turns out everyone was just toking it up over the weekend and must have gotten a little paranoid,” said Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin, who apologized for the alarm and concern that followed after U.S.
fighter pilots gunned down the mysterious flying objects that were spotted over Alaska, the Yukon, and Lake Huron over the weekend, and that turned out to be mere passenger planes. “Boeing 737s, to be specific. Whoops. An overreaction, I guess. If it helps, the planes were only three-quarters full. You guys really shouldn’t go out when you’re this high.
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