'The wedding was on April fool's day. When the officiant asked the groom if he took this woman to be his wife, he paused and starting weighing his choice aloud. The groom then decided to lighten the mood by yelling, 'APRIL FOOL'S!''
"At my ex-best friend's wedding, the groom said, with TEARS in his eyes, 'I'm so happy that you chose me to be your dick for life.' Bro...NO. They are now divorced.""Years ago, I worked for a wedding venue and had to be there from the time vendors and the bridal party showed up, all the way to the end of the reception, so I've witnessed some doozies.
One, in particular, sticks out in my mind: The bride was young, very sweet, and an overall pleasure, while the groom was more preoccupied with heavily pre-gaming with his buddies and generally being kind of an ass to everyone, including the bride. When it came time for the vow exchange, the officiant said that the bride and groom had written their own vows about what they loved most about each other.
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