The new Super Mario Bros. movie and its accompanying theme park are the very sort of soulless corporate enterprise the 1993 Super Mario Bros. movie tried to warn us about.
. The central premise sees the two brothers square off against an AU Trump-esque villain, militaristic company man Koopa. Koopa holds a chokehold on the media, forbids protest music, and uses a private police force to keep people in check. Imagine theme park rules and regulations applied to a city—right down toMorton and Jankel frame this sort of tight governance, city planning, and media control as inherently villainous.
Translation? Less hyper-political Roland Joffe fever dreams from the Max Headroom team, more inherently corporate productions made to sell videogames. This is how Nintendo intends to further its own “magic” going into the new decade—“video clips” and theme parks that enhance the prospective value and mindshare of an intellectual property.
But this isn’t magic—quite the opposite. Since the 1960s, Disney has decimated vast swaths of Florida land in the name of “magic.” They have rewritten local laws and ordinances to destroy communities, filled swamps with concrete, and eradicated much of the regional wildlife. What has been done to the state of Florida over the past century is cartoon villainy done in the name of cartoon reality.
Everything from SeaWorld to Universal to every last fucking Fun Spot followed. Florida is now the place to go if you want to attend Hogwarts, ride a roller coaster that holds some silly record, or go watch a whale die slowly in a tank. And thanks in part tolikely immortalized in the Universal corporate canon—it will be one of the only places you can see plastic mushrooms and plastic trees from an old videogame.
is—promotion for an aging theme park governed by fascist state policy. Another concrete monstrosity supported by a drip feed of “memorable moments.” Cold, unfeeling gray where even the smallest mushroom is plucked before it can grow through the cracks.Madeline Blondeau is a Georgia-born, PNW-based editor, writer and podcaster. Her words can be found on
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