Read an excerpt from blueifiwasnt's 'This Is Major: Notes on Diana Ross, Dark Girls, and Being Dope'
Illustration: By Blacksneakers You are here because you are cool. You have arrived. You’ve finally landed a career in some transparent millennial advertising agency with the pinball machine and the snacks and the sliding-glass office spaces.
Becky blurts a half-assed idea off the top of her head. You think, That’s a stupid idea, and agree it’s a great idea, directing her toward the list of reasonably executable advertising campaigns you spent most of the night working up, looking for the thought most similar to hers. She says if you’d been working in creative longer, you would know why your idea wouldn’t work. That may be so. You ask her if the two of you can keep cracking at hers.
The project idea you present to your creative director is solid. The pitch gets pushed through. You and Becky are set to lead a team that will help flesh out your vision. The mood is all backslaps and high fives. You return to your sustainable reclaimed bamboo-table workstation expecting this will be your and Becky’s moment right out of an ebony-and-ivory buddy movie, but based on the way she slams her MacBook down onto her desk, it appears this is not the time.
“Did you try to ‘hash it out’ with her?” asks Tammy from HR as she pulls out an empty folder from a pristinely organized filing cabinet. She draws a fresh incident-report form and a retractable ballpoint pen from her desk drawer. The actions themselves are comforting, almost Zen. The next time you see Tammy, she comes to you. You are still adrift in the transparent millennial office space, cutting your eyes every now and then at Becky, who seems happier than My Little Pony. You use the time to make yourself as invisible as possible so that everyone forgets you work there. You still have no assignment.
They place the next Black freelance employee near your workstation. She has an anti-gentrification bumper sticker on the face of her laptop, and she mutes, but doesn’t remove, her Beats headphones when people stop by her desk to chitchat. She is the better version of everything you used to be before you worked here. Before you swallowed down your instincts with big gulps of on-tap rosé and an insurance plan that allows you regular visits to your favorite naturopath.
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