My husband and I stopped dividing chores into 'his' and 'her' jobs, and now things are actually getting done (by melissapetro)
Melissa Petro is a freelance writer based in New York where she lives with her husband and two small children.
During the pandemic, the couple has made an effort to divide chores more evenly using a family to-do list, which has made running their home more of a team effort.It's hard to break a habit. Take feeding my family, for instance: Of all the drudgery I get saddled with, I actually enjoy making dinner — and I'm good at it. Whereas my husband? Not so much, and so night after night, I'd become the one that cooks.
. Part of the reason: we've taken experts' advice and made a concerted effort to do away with our "his" and "her" to do lists. The effect has been profound: My husband and I divide the labor more equally, we have more appreciation for one another's contributions, and those big projects that used to fall through the cracks? They're actually getting done. The author with her husband and son.Before we had kids it wasn't so noticeable.
If research is any indication, I was probably correct: Of heterosexual couples with children, polls indicate, especially the easily discounted but indispensable, under-the-radar tasks that keep home and family life afloat. Not only do women perform significantly more housework than men, but the chores we do are arguable worse.
When Arran went away on a work trip, I couldn't function independently because things like plugging in my phone, and even turning on the TV had become "his" job. I felt burnt out, but too nervous to take a much needed "momcation."
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