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, L.M.H.C., therapist and cofounder of Brooklyn-based therapy practice Viva Wellness, tells SELF. “We have barely scratched the surface of the psychological toll of 2020, so however much rest you think you need is probably not enough.”
To start to figure out what rest means to you, you might want to reframe how you think about it in the first place. “Relaxation is not one activity—it’s the outcome of any activity,” says Caraballo. And which activities lead to relaxation will depend on you. Explore hobbies, different types of physical activity, various means of socializing,practices, and more. Then pay attention.
The most important part of scheduling rest: Be honest about what you want and need. You don’t want to use scheduling as a tool to try to restrict yourself; use it to protect your time. For example, if you know in your heart of hearts you, give yourself permission to do just that from the get-go. Don’t block off an hour of time in hopes it’ll magically make you need less time unwinding and then beat yourself up when you inevitably press “Next Episode” over and over, anyway.
According to Caraballo, that sort of restrictive behavior actually works against our rest. “When you don’t have smaller moments more regularly, you can fall into binges,” he says. And given that for many, binges of all sorts can come with guilt, shame, and other emotions that impact our ability torelax, it’s a lot more effective to build relaxation into your schedule regularly.
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