Reddit has a LOT of thoughts for one parent...
OP laments that this is all a simple misunderstanding and asked if she was in the wrong, and nearly every comment was a resounding “Yes,” especially in regards to the sham excuse OP came up with.
“And that’s precisely what makes her an a–h—. She said she didn’t have enough food for an 8-year-old. At a BBQ. It’s hardly surprising the neighbors are offended,” noted one. “YTA – It would be different if you were going somewhere else and couldn’t take them with you, but this was at your house. And then you add the excuse of you wouldn’t have enough, how much do you think an 8 yr old that already ate is going to eat? That child should have been welcomed with open arms,” echoed another.
A few defended OP’s decision, but with a caveat. “As a parent of a similarly aged kid, this is TOTALLY reasonable, and that alone would make you NTA.
“That said, I think you handled this situation poorly, which made you come across as TA. Instead of being honest … you made a weird excuse about food that was obviously not true and just feels stingy. I would write the parents a note apologizing for the misunderstanding, explaining that you and your husband were already overwhelmed with the number of people at your house and handled it poorly, and asking for a play date at your house on another day,” concluded the fellow parent.
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