July 20, 1991, Newton, MA: Attendees called Daniel Guterman’s ceremony “just plain embarrassing” for his entire family and “a colossal waste of time.”
ceremony, Uncle Howard strained a muscle in his back while attempting to hoist the 40-pound Torah and had to be helped to his seat by Aunt Sharon. Guests agreed it was all downhill from there.June 10, 1961, Santa Rosa, CA: Bar mitzvah attendees reported that Ruben Brosbe’s voice cracked midway through hisrecital, after which his tallis slipped off and dragged on the ground as he was descending the bimah, producing audible groans throughout the congregation.Dec.
19, 1987, Van Nuys, CA: Reception guests were roundly disappointed at the poorly conceived baseball theme at Nathaniel Birnbaum’s bar mitzvah party, which included a cardboard cutout of Dodgers catcher Mike Scioscia instead of fan-Mar. 25, 1995, Stamford, CT: Aaron Wechsler fucked up the V’ahavta big time, and couldn’t pull it together for the Avot and Gevurot.Apr. 8, 2006, Havertown, PA: Guests at Jacob Sherman’s bar mitzvah said they had seen better chair dances from a porpoise.Feb.
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